Tell me about yourself, I couldn't stand hearing that, meeting someone new or applying for a job, no matter what the situation may be. It made me feel like I didn't know who I was, what I wanted from myself or, what plans I had for myself. I would get so offended, but of course, I didn't tell them. But now, now that I have a chance to look at myself, to look deep in the mirror and say "Hey, who are you"?? Those words, tell me about yourself, have a new meaning.
I have loved sports and played them since I was a child: track, baseball, volleyball, tennis, and football. But somewhere along the way I was told that I didn't like some of those things and I started to believe it. I let people put a label on me and it wasn't just with a sticky note. As I was watching my favorite NFL team play I recalled something that my ex once said, "Oh, PhiLana doesn't like watching sports. She can't stand it!" I thought Wait! how did I get to the point in my life that I had people telling other people untrue information, all while, I stood by and let it happen. Because the truth is, I love watching football, especially when my team is winning!! :-) And believe me, at that moment I was very much enjoying it. That thought wouldn't leave my head, so after the game I had to do some searching. Did I really go almost 10 years of not watching, enjoying or being apart of this? Why and how did it that happen?
As I started gathering my thoughts I found out that there was a lot more to it than just not watching football that had changed and it all was because of someone else. Let me stop you before you start thinking something else...I could name names and point out to you that because of this person, I stopped doing this or, because of that person I started do that but after thinking it all over, the true person that I had to blame was me. I felt like something was missing in my life, incomplete if you will, but I didn't know what. I let what someone else said about me define me, I was just going through the motions of life but not living it the way I wanted and that was wrong of me. I became Labeled!
While doing this research about myself, I came across something Dr. Phil said and it hit me like a ton of bricks!!! Wow, I just said that, I just thought that, that is me…Dr. Phil states that there's a Authentic Self and a Fictional Self. The Authentic Self is the you that can be found at your absolute core. It is the part of you not defined by your job, function, or role. The Fictional Self sends you false information about who you are and what you should be doing with your life. It blocks the information you need in order to maintain the connection with your authentic identity. I was being the Fictional Self and it was time to change. Read Dr. Phil's Article Here
It's so clear now! I wasn't being true to myself, I wasn't being me. I was being the person that my labels said I should be. Now let's not start thinking that I was living a life that I didn't love because I did love it but I wasn't in love with it. You see I stopped drawing, writing, traveling, watching sports, I stopped living the life that I was supposed to be living and that was the thing that was missing. I'm sure some of what I am doing is new to some people and they may think that I'm not being me, that I'm not being real, but they are wrong and I will not let them label me this time.
So PhiLana tell me about yourself, "I like what I like, I am who I am and this time I will not let labels define me."
Born in the city and raised in the mountains of Ky. Taking on life one day at a time!